21. Being alone. I was rarely ever alone before, and even when I was it wasn't for long. I didn't have to spend that alone-time having to comprehend the fact that I'd never see you again.
22. Being around friends and family to kick-it. We did everything together! Being around the very people we spent soooooo much time with together just intensifies my grief.
***In other words, being alone sucks...and being around people sucks. I can't avoid either so I know I must get thru those moments of weakness. Grief sucks!
23. Bookstore cafe's. It's just not the same without you with me/us.
24. Candy!!! OK babe - you'll think I'm crazy but when you left, you took my sweet tooth with you! SERIOUSLY! I went from craving sweets 24/7 to finding foods/desserts/drinks TOO sweet! I wonder if my cravings had anything to do with the fact that you always brought me sweets, often times to suprise me. I practically quit sweets cold turkey. That's probably why i've been losing weight:).
25. Pretty pink skies, sunrises/sunsets, and all other pretty views. I can't see them for what they are anymore. All I see in them is you...and that makes me painfully miss you.
26. Quiet. I can't concentrate on anything when it's too quiet. I need noise to drown my random thoughts and keep that roller coaster of emotions from coming out.
27. Watching TV. Criminal Minds, Law & Order, CSI, The Closer - we'd always talk thru these shows. Debating what would happen next and acting like we know better than law enforcement! LoL
28. Movies. I've tried to watch movies, but I just can't. Even movies that we never watched together before. I don't know why...maybe its my attention span?!?! I understand not being able to watch mushy love stories, or movies that we've watched together, but ALL movies? I just don't get it.
29. Driving. You did 99% of the driving when we were together. It was a "man thing". Even when you'd be super tired and I'd be too paranoid to fall asleep so I could make sure you'd stay awake.
30. Sleep. It doesn't come easy these days. It has to do with the quiet, not having you to tuck me in, and the fact that my brain refuses to rest!
OK - I think it's time to stop w/ the DISlikes... Imma go and try to sleep, even though I'm not yet delirious. I really need to get myself on a normal sleeping pattern! The earlier I sleep each night the closer I'll get to it. :) Goodnight hun. 1434
Here's my letter to you, Mark Matthew Aragon. The LOVE of my life, and Papa to our girls, who's Heavenly birthday is 11/04/2010. There's so much I want to say and if Heaven had a phone, I'd call. Missing & loving you more everyday, Lei
