Sunday, December 26, 2010

December 11, 2010 at 12:30am

On August 27 at 9:24pm you wrote:
Officially a Fire Fighter in training. With a Few issues I was trying to take care of, I thought I wasn't going to be able to start my Fire Fighter Classes until next semester. It's taken care of and now diving right into it. God is good and definitely answers my prayers....
My comment:
He ain't joking!!!! Long story short...we made the tough decision to submit to the Lord's will last night (shouldn't have been so tough, but we're human!)...I spent hours upon hours in the Word today, while Mark was at work, and just a few hours ago The Lord totally came thru for us! I was laughing and crying at the same time!!!! Literally!!! I replayed in my head the way I've been studying "submission" and "waiting on the Lord" lately, then how we faced a tough situation which we prayed on and asked the Holy Spirit to guide our minds and thoughts and calm our hearts as we submit to His will...it was still hard for me today, so I stayed as close to Him as I possibly could thru scripture, nonstop worship music and books...and He soooooo came thru!!!!! (YES! That was my SHORT version!!!! LOL)
I remember this day so clearly! You gave me the good news, and I sat across the desk from you laughing, and crying so hard! To see God's work in our lives after literally and willingly submiting to and waiting on the Lord in a situation that we were so badly tempted to give up is PRICELESS! So that was it! You started online courses to become a firefighter, and I was continuing my HIT courses. In 2-3 years, we were gonna be set!

Then on the early morning of 11/04/2010, two CHP officers initiated a high-speed chase on I-580 in San Leandro. The chase continued for 7-8 miles because the CHP officers just HAD TO give the driver of the fleeing vehicle a speeding ticket! Then the chase continued onto the Oakland streets (AKA-OPD territory, NOT CHP territory) because the CHP officers just HAD TO give the that driver a speeding ticket! About a mile into Oakland, at the corner of MacArthur & 106th, is where the chase tragically ended and you took your last breath...but no one got a speeding ticket.

You know how much I can't stand feeling anger or hatred! I love to be happy and at peace! But baby, I am so ANGRY! No matter how much I try to block the pain of how you were so suddenly taken away...I just can't! We had to bury our 32-year old husband & papa because of a speeding ticket?!?! It makes NO sense at all!!! To top it off, it's well over a month since this happened and the CHP has NOTHING to say to explain how their pursuit policy served the public interest that night?!?! We had to play phone tag for weeks just to hear "my condolences" today...a month and a week later??? Seriously????

Babe - I know that you wouldn't want this to happen to anyone, ever again! Many parts of California don't even allow high-speed chases, and for good reason! No innocent man's life should be taken so tragically, and no family should have to suffer so harshly due to such a terrible injustice. So, just know that we love you...we miss you...and we'll do all that we can to see to it that this doesn't happen again!

I love you more... --------- Today is Friday, 5/9/2014. I just read that post again...it's been a while. It reminds me of where I was back then. Angry at the CHP because I "needed" someone to blame. I couldn't blame the 19 year old the cops were chasing because he lost his life too, and I "needed" something alive and that could listen to know how much they messed up! Thankfully, that phase didn't last long. I quickly came to realize the many ways God used that tragedy for HIS good and HIS glory.