December 20, 2010 at 4:33am

The year is almost over and the past 2 months are such a blurr to me! I still feel like everyday is the day I found out you were called home to be with the Lord.

So, I found out yesterday that I (barely) passed two of the three classes I took fall semester thru SBCC. Not bad, considering I didn't do a month of work at all! The class I didn't pass was based solely on assignments and there really was no way for me to make it all up, while the finals saved my butt in the other two! If it wasn't for the fact that you sacrificed so much and pushed me so much to go to school, I doubt I woulda had the motivation I needed during these past couple weeks...so THANK YOU!

The downside is that all the classes I registered for for spring semester have the class I failed as a prerequisite:(. But its all good though. I just have to take retake it and wait till summer to take the next set of courses. I'm considering taking regular classes here in Sac, as opposed to online courses. I think I need the classroom setting to keep me from going astray. Luckily, there's an accredited program thru a local community college:). I really don't want to let you down baby! I will finish! I promise!

The girls are on Christmas break now, thank God! :) Trying to develop a routine, grieve, deal with other issues, and "surviving the holidays" was getting more and more difficult! Sometimes I feel like locking myself in my room and not coming out till January 2nd! But I realize that wouldn't do me any good cuz all I'd have are memories of you, with no distractions (not that memories of you are bad...you know what i mean).

I'm starting to listen to music much more now. I kinda stopped for a while because of the emotions tied to most of the music I have. I have to skip thru a lot of songs though. Its amazing how so many memories we have are triggered by certain songs! Not just slow jams...even fast songs and gospel/praise & worship music! I remember so clearly when you heard "I Never Lost my Praise" sung at Valley Bible Church! We were standing just worshiping and I looked over to you and you were in tears! I can count on one hand how many times I saw you cry during the entire time I've known you! That's probably why that moment is so vivid in my mind! It was the Sunday after grandma passed away, so the song spoke into your life! That's why when Deb asked me if I had any special requests for them to sing at your viewing, that was it...

I'm so glad our faith grew so much so fast during your last years with us. You were always a wonderul guy, I have no doubt of that. But being a wonderful man of God prepared you for the intense homecoming I'm sure you received in Heaven. And not just that...we can rest assured that you are truly resting in peace up there. To God be the glory!

Loving and missing you more every second...